sure it looks sweet from the outside. its got a guard at the gate and some big palm trees, not to mention its right on Ventura Blvd. I was quite impressed for the 10 minutes it took to sign the lease.....then I got screwed. There is no parking what so ever. My girlfriend and I live together in a one bedroom and we only get one spot...I'm not the only one in this relationship who dirves a car, so we compete over the 7 visitor spots between the hundreds of other residents looking to park their abondoned 3 wheeled rust buckets. So I like many others have resorted to either parking a 1/4 mile away from my location on the street or in the red zone that happens to line the entire place....and the bastards at the leasing office had the oddacity to try and tow my damn car because "New Management" is being tough on people that dont have a palce to go...If I was handicapped I would have a right mind to burn the place down in frustration, so lucky for all you I have all my limbs in tact. The burden of life continues as I stroll into the frequently piss filled single elevator filled with tacky scratches from some obvious 14 year old used up deuschebag who cant maintain himself for the 10 minutes it takes the elevator to reach my floor...Id take the stairs but the smell of methanphetamines and moldy carpet give me the kind of nautious feeling I only experience after a handle of cheap vodka. finally I reach my apartment unmaintined and repaired from the last resident as it contains paint spilled on the carpet and bathroom cabinets, the previous tennants also seemed to have left their collection of cockroaches which despite my best efforts refuse to face their demise. As I Walk up my stairs the creaking pressure of my footsteps would tend to dislodge a poorly places piece of scrap carpet at the top of my stairs which in the dark looks like a piece of cat crap which ultimately calls me to turn on the lights and realize that I have wasted about 30 seconds of my time. Alas I seek a fresh breath of air from the mind dislodging stench which is the building and realize to my delight that there is a storm drain on my balcony which pleasently drips down onto the balcony below mine.....Rain Gutters are cheap but this place would rather rape you on price by getting you to move to higher ground. reluctantly I go to sleep early so I mind find myself in a hopeful state of unquestionable slumber before I am awakened at 2 in the morning by police helecopters, gun shots, and the occasional jiggle of my door handle and I reach in my closet for the most suitable weapon in my underpants ready to beat in the skull of the nearest leasing agent. I apprently dont get to sleep and as I ask myself why I pay such a rediculous price to live in such a hell hole I remember saying to myself....its on the Blvd and it looks nice from the outside. Being as frustrated as a child with downsysndrome with a rubix cube I politely ask the leasing office for some help....I figure the least they could do is offer me another parking spot so I dont have to battle to the death over the last visitor spot, and after all Im not a visitor; I happen to live in this purgatory called the Avalon. So I call the leasing office, and loe and behold no one answers...I left a dozen messages and nobody calls back....As I wonder if this kind of service also occurs to emergency situations. I decide to go for a drive and relieve some stress on the Los Angeles Freeways to calm my self down...and drive toward the Gate only to find 4 security guards packed into a little guard gate doing absolutely nothing....as a line of cars belonging to people who do not live in the location proceed to just drive right on up, no questions asked...the security consists of kids on crack and one angry black lady who hate my girlfriend and I and is still not convinced that we live on the premises...I would use the clicker I was given by the staff, but the damn thing doesnt work. sO I leave and peel out of the driveway with every madening sensation that could fuel my soul only to realize that eventually I have to go back.....I am happy to say that my lease ends soon and If I do not kill myself or get arrested for things that could only be deemed as questionably unmentionable I will be leaving the Avalon for good.

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